MY WEDDING SHOES ARE HERE!!!

They're so beautiful. I love them. Here's a picture of one side of one shoe, from the website: 

So weird to see this one shoe floating around in all that white space, right? 

They weren't supposed to arrive until July, so this was a nice surprise. And it was a surprise - I had indulged myself by sleeping in, only to be woken by the doorbell. I rolled out of bed in a groggy panic (sometimes the maintenance guy comes by unannounced, which is why I sometimes sleep in yoga pants, to make it seem like I didn't just wake up) but it was just the FedEx lady. She was probably scandalized to find me still in my pajamas and glasses, my hair all puffed-up and insane. "Still in bed at 10:20?" she must have thought. "What a slug-a-bed! I delivered one hundred packages before dawn!" But whatever. She doesn't know my life. 

I haven't had a transcription assignment since the weekend, so I've had nothing to do but run errands, do a little other work and some odds and ends, and plan a wedding. And, sometimes, laze about. But it's nobody's business how I spend my days. I would have told her all that, but the thought of speaking was too exhausting.

Anyway. The shoes.

I love shoes. Unusual ones. I don't own too many, but the ones I do buy are usually interesting. I've had pointy witch-y boots and sandals with balloons tied around the straps and white running shoes that I covered with colorful Sharpie designs. I spent all of eighth grade dressed in black pants rolled up past the ankle, a black tank top, A WHITE BELT, and yellow Converse. In college, because I didn't own snow boots, I tromped around in bright pink rain boots underneath a red winter coat. Now, in my old age, I've settled down into red Keds. My shoes are the only thing I'm never self-conscious about. 

What I'm really trying to say is that I dress myself like a toddler.

I had this pair made (of course, because I'm out of control) by Shoes of Prey. Who woulda thought I'd be unable to find a pair of gold oxfords for sale anywhere on the whole, wide internet? It's all about white satin kitten heels with bows on the front here in Bride Land. I haven't decided if these are just going to be my dancin' shoes or if I'll wear them during the ceremony, too. People keep telling me to wear heels because my legs will look nicer, especially since I'm wearing a tea length dress and I've got the legs of a pygmy, but I kinda like the idea of groovin up the aisle wearing some sweet gold kicks.

At this rate, I'm going to need one million pennies to pay for all these shoes. I'll be in penny debt till I die. They'll send me to the penny shoe poor house or penny debtor's prison. But at least my feet will be CLAD IN GOLD.