So you want your wedding to be memorable and original. You want your details to stand out. You want a little something special to adorn your tables, but you're not into anything safe and expected, like citrus in a wooden box. I get it. In fact, I almost didn't post this because I wanted to keep every one of these ideas for myself. However, for the sake of avoiding another wedding season spent staring at books stacked jauntily on top of starched white tablecloths, here are five ways to up the danger with your decor:
Option 1: Salt and Pepper Shaker Vases
Wildflowers in tiny vases may seem darling and unassuming, but don't underestimate the bride who sets her tables with these bad boys. There are only so many adorably mismatched salt and pepper shakers to be found in thrift stores; the other 90% need to be stolen from diners and cafes. What's that? Too "moral" or "afraid" to pocket a salt shaker from a Denny's? I'm sorry, I thought you cared about your special day. Sure, you may no longer be welcome at any IHOP within a 30-mile radius, but that's the price you pay for the perfect wedding.
Option 2: Fire
Aw, you thought tea candles would be a nice touch for your tables? AMATEUR HOUR.
For the couple that wants guests out of their seats and on the dance floor, look no further. Thanks to Science, we have the capacity to engineer tables that shoot fire from different points on the table's surface, like a face-melting version of Whac-a-Mole.
This centerpiece does double duty: Try serving raw meat on metal plates to be cooked table-top, or roast a piglet before their very eyes. Your friends and family will love having a front-row seat, no matter where they sit!
Option 3: The Dead
Couples often wonder how best to honor those loved ones who can't be present on their wedding day. Some write a note in their programs, others reserve a seat at the ceremony or send balloons skyward with solemn remembrance. Those are all lovely ideas, but why not include your deceased relatives, loved ones, or even pets in your tablescape? Dress them up with flowers or crepe paper - you know they'd want to be lookin' fly on this joyous occasion.
Option 4: Voodoo Dolls
Any sociologists getting married? Try this fun experiment: Make a voodoo doll for every guest, but put them on different tables. Then just...see what happens.
Option 5: A Badger
Yeah, badgers are endearingly gawky, and everyone knows the chill reputation of the Honey Badger. But these beasts have been known to fight bears, lions, and cobras and win, so you know the little guys can party. Sit a badger in the middle of every table, and people will be talking about your wedding for years. Plus, they make great favors for guests to take home. Flower arrangements die in a week, but badgers live forever.
Images via Real Simple, Regency, Urn Garden, Aenigma Project, and The Guardian.
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